Palms to the wind

Waking up at 6a.m. In Hawaii was perfectly natural and relaxing. The sunrise is then and the island comes alive with birds and palms in the wind. 

I love to be here, surrounded by everything so great it humbles one’s self. I feel put in my place–eyes looking beyond me and hands lifted–a reflection of all creation to it’s Creator: palms to the wind..

We have had so much family time I haven’t even blogged about our days!!

Day 1: 

We woke up at 6a.m. and ate breakfast and headed out to see our walking distance beach just north of us. We walked out onto the lava stones, saw a seal, and enjoyed the morning sunshine. 

We then headed out for a day of beach hopping going west! We hit up two different beaches (sunset and pipeline) before getting to our lunch place and visiting some shops. After going to another beach (Waimea Bay) we made it back to the townhouse for dinner, mom and I headed the kithen, my sister in law got the dishes washed, Mi Amor set the table and my brother and dad conversed with us. Being a family on an island like this is just so enchantingly peaceful. This is the first trip we have had as just the six of us. What a HUGE blessing this is.

Mom, my sister/in/law, and I ended the day by watching the sunset.

Day 2: I wake up at 5a.m. And wake Mi Amor up, we fill the water bottle and grab two apple-bananas (our favorite type of banana) an head to watch the sunrise. 

The morning light brings such awe as the darkness is overcome. 

We walked back and found our family eating breakfast. We all put on our swimsuits for a day of adventuring and snorkeling!! We headed east. Going to several beaches, (I can’t even name them all we went to so many!!!) stopping at lookouts, the Byodo In Temple, and walking up to Makapu’u Lighthouse. We ended the southern route with Hanauma Bay for the last free hour and a half, then we hit up china mans hat island, across from the Jurtasic Park filming location.  A very enjoyable day where we all laughed and joked, swam and snorkeled, and are authentic Hawaiian cuisine from a very hole in the wall place Mi Amor found with GREAT reviews. It was a fantastic experience for us all to share a meal and talk story. 

“Talk story” is an expression often used in Hawaii which basically means sharing experiences and listening to other lives; learning from each other. 

My family is more blessed than I ever realized. I praise The Lord for how He has been faithful to my family. 

I can learn a lot from these people, when’s the last time you talked story with your family?

An Art of Virtue

DSCN7653

This word is so powerful to me; it is reminiscent of trials and joy.

Patience is something that is cultivated, worked for, sought after–a capacity, ability, art, and choice.

Patience for healing, patience for marriage, patience for a job, enrollment in classes, bread rising, a painting to dry… So many things require us to choose:
Patience or Frustration

 A representation of how I view patience is a scene of peaceful streams, sunlight, gentle wavered flowers, and the smell of lilacs in the air. Patience is to calm yourself in a storm. Patience is to inhale….and exhale……

This is why it is an art.
To be a thinker of the situation rather than a doer at first. To react in your mind, in a sense of calm, to the frustrations of the life instead of participating in the mindless cries of a victim.

For the last four years I have sought after patience, asked God for it, and had it tattooed on myself. My life has changed by that ‘pause’ that I take {not all the time of course, because I do have times where I flip out}, it has transformed me based on the thought process: “I can’t change the circumstances, so what do I do to use this time wisely?”

Its as if I’m a hiker, who makes it to the top, huffing and puffing, but then lifts up my face to see the magnificent view. After enjoying for a bit, I take a slight glance to my left and see another steep cliff. *Deep Inhale* “Alright, let’s do this.”
It’s the continuous movement of strength. Without the training from the smaller hill, I wouldn’t have the lessons learned and abilities to climb those bigger ones.

One rain drop raises the sea.

{{So Many Thoughts}}

Today, my dad spoke an amazing message at church about the role of women, in singleness and marriage. 

Here’s my heart;
like always, I’m going to be translucent…

The saying “Behind every great man, there’s a great woman” is actually quite inspiring to me.

My mom has always been a great role model for showing respect. My parents have taught me a lot about what marriage should look like, according to the Biblical standard. 

I understand that being a wife, a Biblical wife, is hard work.
To serve

To uplift
To be faithful to
To strengthen
To be a helpmeet
To compliment
To encourage
To love
To respect  

Need I go on? 

I truly desire to be in this challenge. But more than that…I want to make Mi Amor’s life easier and better.
My dad spoke today on Genesis 2:18
“The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.” 

{Helper} to put into perspective, means to make the job easier.
I want to make life better for him.

I want to be his ‘Ein Gedi’
{Song of Solomon reference}
his oasis.
I want him to tell me even the little events of his day.
I want to comfort him and laugh with him.

I’m looking forward to him teasing me about the way I say words.
Making cheesecakes for our friends.
Decorating our house.
Seeing the process of every art project he works on.
There’s so much more I am anticipating.

I’m gonna be moving away to Grand Rapids and I’ll be living there 5 months without him. I know it’ll be fine, we’ll just have to adjust to the circumstances…
~~~

There’s a lot to learn in my ‘singleness’ {unmarried} life.
I’ll have the adventure of a lifetime learning how to be the best I can be for Mi Amor.
Working on my inner self is where it all starts.
Patience with this is the hardest thing I’ve ever done.

My prayer life needs work, so I’ve been praying for patience for both Mi Amor and I.
~~~

I’ve been hearing God deeply speak;

“Come away with Me,
with all your heart”

It’s pretty powerful, and ‘with all my heart’ is a bigggggg request.
my heart needs work,
but as I wait and try moving forward,
I’ve found I have a lot more self-consciousness to overcome.

More and more roadblocks arise as I realize my need for change;
to line myself up with God’s desires is a huge feat.

…this path is hard,
but I continue on daily.

He’s Crazy

Fall is coming!
Do you know what that means!?!?
Apple pies, soups, crock pot meals, home-made bread, cinnamon, crisp grounds, and SCARVES!

I think that this fall, here in Michigan, I will enjoy unlike any other. I will appreciate this fall more because it’s been a while. I was in Panama a year ago, missed the color changes and the frost. Speaking of frost, I can attempt to make grape jam after we have some good frosts, soon–I’ll make sure to capture that adventure just like my last!

I had an interview Tuesday, the company is not a chain and it’s owned by brothers. I could not have asked for a better interview; it was fabulous. I just received my second call for my second interview! (going over specifics for the job) All-in-all, God’s got a plan.

I’m realizing, after reading “Crazy Love” by Francis Chan with my worship team that, basking in God’s greatness is one of the best ways to focus deeper on Him.
It is hard to capture at first though.
Just viewing His creation, making myself small,  allows Him to fill my sight; consuming me in a blanket of perfection.
He is perfect.
We are God’s idea.
He created us.
If my loving, just, compassionate, personal God created all that my eyes can see, then why worry or stress, when that’s losing sight of who He is?
The one who holds my life, my future, my purpose, in His hands. I will struggle, yes.
I will fall, yes.
I will say stupid things.
I will screw-up.
I may even cause someone else to falter…
And I shudder, because I’ve done these already…
But I smile, because He’s not left me.
He will never leave me nor forsake me.
God will use whatever circumstances I get myself into, for His glory, because I love Him; because He first loved me.
So, throw away your tomorrows, because today has enough worries for itself.
But, don’t worry, cause He’s got your heart,
He’s got your hand, He’s super-glued to you.
Face it. He’s crazy about you. 

Breezes

The more I’m around older generations, the more I’m introduced to the wisdom of ante-days.
Being wise has it’s perks, as long as you are willing to share that knowledge.
My morning began with grandma’s pancakes and homemade bread. I then followed my grandpa out to his garage, where he smokes his pipes and does wood works and odd jobs. He and I sat down, and all the while between puffs of smoke would share our lives.
He told me of my dad, some of the similarities of my brother, jobs, and then THEE subject I struggled with the most…cancer.
He told of how his doctor cannot believe how my grandpa has no pain, with the amount if cancer that consumes him.
I fought tears and swallowed hard often.
It is a blessing to have him here on this earth still, a miracle really.
After an hour or less of chatting we headed to church.
My uncle’s mom is 98 years old and dying slowly…she wants to meet Jesus somethin’ fierce.
We watched this movie tonight called “The Straight Story”. It’s about a man named Alvin Straight who rides his lawnmower halfway across Iowa into Wisconsin to see his brother. They are in their 70’s. Alvin, along the way meets various persons to whom gives advice.
It’s honestly a big adventure, this life. No matter if your a believer or not, the earthly life is a great discovering trail.
I’ve just begun mine, and although I know many who carry it, I’m tapping into the hidden wisdom that situations sow and reap.
I love my grandpa so very much, I am so thankful for the opportunity to share moments with him.
Our lives come and go, just like breezes…

Panama Journal Entries

June 30~

On my way to Panama once again! Yay! Cameron is traveling with me and I am extremely excited for him to experience an inkling of what I lived through for three months.
My mom, dad, and Teresa are all being involved and teaching a marriage seminar in El Valle.
Cameron and I are watching the children so that the couples are able to deepen their love for one another without such distractions.
God will use us–I know it!

He is awesome, mighty, and graceful–who knows what whispering ways He’ll work in us… 

I am practicing my Spanish in my head and have been for the last week. I had two days where my rambling mind only allowed me four hours of sleep.

I have only spoken little bits, here and there, but this trip I am going to try to be more outgoing and not care how bad my Spanish is~yo necesito a practicando! 

Our flight goes from Detroit to Houston to Panama City. And we are currently about an hour and a half from Panama!
Gracias a Dios por su bondad! Safe flights are ALWAYS nice! 

Sleep seems to be out the door–none of us has really rested well, just enough to rest the eyes.. Good thing today we don’t have too much planned besides catching up with mi otra familia and putting together the marriage seminar books.
I CAN’T BELIEVE I’M BACK!!!!!!!!!
 

July 1~

Genesis 25 con mi amor; Cameron.

Went to visit the school today and saw so many familiar faces, each one of them lit up my heart as their smiles came after meeting my eyes. 

When Nair saw me, I almost cried because of how much she hugged me.
I was sort of scared that none of the kids would remember me, but the girls saw me at the playground and Cameron put it this way “She was mobbed and I was back, standing alone watching”.

Jesús {one of the second graders from last year that I connected with} was in my friend Florencia’s third grade class, so when she was outside her door-I asked her if I could see him.
She called him outside, “Jesús, please come here”
I was slightly around the corner digging in my back pack for a picture and frame that I put together for him for his birthday the next week.
His little body popped out the door and when his eyes met mine, I saw something I’ve never seen before–ever. Desperation for love and an unbelief of presence. I almost cried how tight he held me around my neck as I picked him up in an embrace unlike any of the other kid’s. 

I love that boy, I pray he realizes that. 

Nair introduced me as her sister to her class 🙂

It was different without Sanna…

I love Cameron, he is so quiet and trying to soak up everything. I think he’s comfortable, but frustrated with the fact that he can’t speak Spanish–I know; I was there…I still am sorta there.
I pray God uses us. There are only so many scheduled options for God though…He’s to marvelous to work in a way we expect! 

When José picked Cameron and I up from the Weet’s house, we were introduced to three new couples, I reunited with Glendon and Isa and then met Glendon’s wife!

Rita–who is a Spanish teacher to a high school helped me practice all the way to El Valle. She doesn’t know much English but she is good at helping others, like me communicate. Just like me, she understands more than she speaks (her for English, me for Spanish)
I told her I needed her in my life and that she was good for me. 

José told me that my Spanish was very good. I told him that I hadn’t practiced when I was home. He was astounded.
I think that it was just a lot easier {by God} because I gained self-confidence and decided to not care how terrible I truly do speak. 

It is so good to have friends and family here!!!
I have missed Panama mucho…

July 2~

I woke up this morning and after walking on the beautiful pathway, Rita came up tome and was excited so she started speaking rapid Spanish. I was trying to understand as much as I could, but keeping up was hard–so hard in fact that I misunderstood her; I thought she was asking me to talk to her daughter on facebook, but really she said that I DO talk to her daughter! Then she said the name of her daughter and it clicked that I had misinterpreted and actually KNEW her!!! I was so surprised and happy, I hugged her at least five times. Haha! 

The kids and us overseers went on a long walk for two hours while the sessions for marriage were happening. 

I have never seen Cameron so precious and endearing before. Lucas is a {8 month old(?)} baby who Cameron sweetly carried when my arm got tired, it was so adorable to see him care for him. He was so good with the kids.

I had a good supper with Michelle, Cameron, Kati, and a couple who are a pastor and wife from Chèpo. She doesn’t speak much English at all, but she knows some nouns.
He said he knew some English, but forgot a lot because he did not practice.
Michelle assisted in being the translator when I struggled understanding or spelling correctly.
It was SO good to do that again, like I did in the tribe, except I had Michelle as a translator this time! 

Cameron and I talked a bit before we each went to our rooms. We both are finding it hard to not treat this like a vacation We don’t feel as though we are needed as much as hoped for. Hopefully God brings the harvest to our eyes–a very encouraging thing, BUT even if He does not, I pray I trust Him better yet. 

Feeding Lucas and walking with the group; that's my man 🙂