Downcast Face

Philippians 4
Rejoice in the Lord always;
again I will say, rejoice.
Let your reasonableness be known to everyone.
The Lord is at hand;
do not be anxious about anything,
but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.
And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Finally, brothers,
whatever is true,
whatever is honorable
, whatever is just,
whatever is pure,
whatever is lovely,
whatever is commendable,
if there is any excellence,
if there is anything worthy of praise,
think about these things.
What you have learned and received and heard and seen in me—practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you.

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Vulnerability for Your Healing

Just because I believe in God doesn’t mean I don’t struggle with this…I’m going to make my self vulnerable and share with you lots about my journey from now on. I hope someone else can find healing along with me. Against my need to feel beautiful, I’m putting myself out there at the end of this post and sharing pictures of my journey…I didn’t take many consecutively because who wants pictures when they’re at their worst?

“Choose to see your experience through God, rather than God through your experience.” {My dad}
This sentence pierced my heart. Think about it for a moment.

God never changes, so why do we let our circumstances change our opinion of Him? This is what it means to be held. God doesn’t only allow issues and says “you’re on your own, pal..”

He allows trials and says :

Come to Me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. {Matt 11:28}

Delight yourself in Me and I will give you the desires of your heart.{Psalm 37:4}

Consider it pure joy, when you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. {James 1:2&3}

In Isaiah 40 it says “Why do you say, O Jacob, and complain, O Israel, ‘My way is hidden from the Lord; my cause is disregarded by my God’? Do you not know? Have you not heard? the Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and His understanding no one can fathom.”

God wants the love of His creation…just like you who have children want the respect and adoration of them, you want them to love you and look up to you…those of you who have spouses, you want to please them and make them happy. You also desire their entire being, you want their faithfulness and commitment…well, God is a jealous God who wants pure hearts. He wants to know you’re serious about Him, captivated, in awe, head-over-heels for Him. Trials prove your love, like fire to gold; all the impurities burn away, and all that is left is beauty.

I’m in agreement with C.S. Lewis, when he said,

“If I find in myself desires which nothing in this world can satisfy, the only logical explanation is that I was made for another world.”

If it wasn’t for my faith, I wouldn’t have a hope of an end for this. My eczema isn’t going to be on my body forever–I was meant for the perfection of Heaven…

He will wipe away every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away. {Rev. 21:4}

I’m currently struggling, struggling for an answer…for some hint of healing…but all the while, it is well with my soul…
I got a foot detox yesterday–hoping for some healing answers…I was confirmed with digestive issues… the Lord has given me resources…and parents who still take care of me and their love abounds greater and greater as I understand it more and more.
Mi Amor and I were talking as we were driving, what we’ve learned from this, how our characters have been challenged, and where we’ve been strengthened.
I made a mental list of his answers so that I can be thankful for what this has done to stretch him into a better man. I now try to meditate and give thanks with a grateful heart when I get an attack…

Make me a servant, humble and meek, Lord let me lift up those who are weak, and may the prayer of my heart always be, make me a servant today. {old song from my childhood}

No matter your situation, we all need healing.
After the blessing of the foot detox and some guidance, and a bath robe..which I am wearing right now, I left with more assurance of God’s guidance. I left work early today because of an attack and now I’m sitting here doing a Bentonite clay mask on my hands and feet/ankles. I have plastic bags over my hands and water on the stove with some essential oils on it, instrumental music playing and the Christmas lights on. I am going to eat minimal food for the next who-knows-how-long, just so I can hope at some healing.
Carrots, freshly juiced with some “Go-Green” powder will be my breakfast. I will have a banana for a snack, carrots and homemade yogurt with flaxseeds in it will be my lunch(with some “Go-Green” in it) and rice with carrots will be my dinner.
I will live off of bananas, carrots, rice, and yogurt for a while.
I’m going to try to blog every-other-day to keep myself accountable. I realize that crap about lack of nutrition but ya know what, eczema is worse–believe me. I want answers, and elimination diets haven’t worked, so we’ll just go down completely and add in something after I start to heal.

Here is the ugly side to this story:

Feb 2013

Feb 2013

Feb 2013

Feb 2013

May 2013

May 2013

November 2013

November 2013

November 2013

November 2013

November 2013

November 2013

December 2013

December 2013

December 2013

December 2013

December 2013

December 2013

December 2013

December 2013

 

Eczema is Curable.

I hate when I read stuff or hear doctors tell me “Eczema or Atopic Dermatitis is chronic and you’ll have it the rest of your life”. I believed this at one point…and ya know what?! There is NO hope in that—this leads to depression. You CAN be healed of eczema.

I’ve linked it to a food allergy. Eczema is always an allergy or hypersensitivity to something (whether it be air, contact, or ingesting)
Thanksgiving day I broke out so horribly bad and only got three hours of sleep and still had to go to work that morning… I now know, from that breakout, that it isn’t something I’m touching or inhaling, it is DEFINITELY something I’m eating. Right now, I’m beginning the first of my three days off, and I’m going to keep a CLOSE watch on what I eat. It almost makes me want to not eat anything though… I am coating my hands in my homemade Calendula salve, oils, balms, and trying to breathe in and out and not scratch.

If you have eczema, eliminate foods from your diet. Sometimes, its easier to eat rice and carrots for two weeks and gradually add a food in—but you have to be careful to make sure you’re taking a great multi-vitamin and drinking lots of water.
Today I’m going to eat one thing at a time—an egg. homemade yogurt. an apple. a clementine. a kiwi. etc…

I’ll be spacing them out and eating like this for the next three days.

I got super itchy last night and this morning and I’m linking it with gluten or wheat—so I’m going to stay away from that altogether for the rest of the year and see if that changes things.

For now, its a continuous challenge, but one day—I will have my skin back….
In the words of that guy on “Galaxy Quest”
Never Give up, NEVER surrender!

Screaming in and out

In the Bible there is a verse that asks, “…how long will they be incapable of purity?” Other versions say, ‘innocence’ as a replacement for the last word.

~~~
The band RED sings a song called ‘Confession’.
There is a line in the song that I say to myself sometimes.
“I confess, I’m always afraid,
always ashamed, of what’s inside my head.”

I hate it, I HATE, that I have lost some of my innocence.
I find myself thinking things that I don’t want to; saying things that I hoped never would come out.
At the end of the song, the band targets emotion from one whom actually feels and lives this song.
“Take this away; help me escape,
Take this away, I confess:
INNOCENCE! INNOCENCE! INNOCENCE!”
~~~

It is truly sad how the world has corrupted our minds.
Sometimes, I just want to pound my head with my fist to rid my mind of the world’s effect.
Thankfully there IS hope, and it isn’t through bodily harm.
There is a Creator who loves us, and cares for our innocence.
Crying out to Him, like in the song, will be His invite.
I need to constantly cleanse myself…I fail so many times to do this though.
Thankfully, God gives many chances
I just hope that you will realize that there is a Saviour out there who loves you, more than any girl or guy on Earth can…more than all your friends COMBINED!

O God; sweet Jesus; Holy One, within me…
Create in me a pure heart, mind, and soul.
Let me be cleansed with Your almighty love.
I confess: I’m not as innocent as I once was.
I’m screaming in and out.
Help me!