Childhood Pushing For Winter

Pumpkin, Apple, Chai, & Carmel slowly fade as Winter pushes Fall into the past. 

Pine, Cinnamon, Hot chocolate & cookies take center stage as November rolls in. 

Coffee shops, like the one I’m in, always make me feel so much more inspired.

Our new living room arrangement does look magnificent, if I do say so myself.

Rizo & I stayed up late last night, after I got back from work, dreaming of help exchanging.

She’s got this great plan for France.

I honestly, envy her. She has so much freedom. She’s able to just go & leave everything, being fully present while adventuring to other countries.

I have lived in Grand Rapids the same amount of time as I lived in Panama.
I can’t imagine doing that again for that long at this point in my life.

Being fully present…

Jim Elliot said “Wherever you are, be all there”

My heart is so much entwined with Mi Amor’s, that I can’t imagine being three thousand miles away, rather than 2 and 1/2 hours.

Rizo told me at one point, she’d just go and perpetually travel, help exchanging everywhere. And ya know what, its TOTALLY possible for her. 

I can’t express enough how much I envy that. 

Its not possible for me to be fully in Europe for three months. My heart would long for home. Oh, how funny our hearts are. 

I talked with a British pharmacy intern two days ago, I asked him about England and Bath-where he’s from. He made me want to just up and leave.
& last night with Rizo, she said, “You should come with me to France!” And I was all for it…but having my ‘big girl pants on’, I’d lose my job if I did that. 

growing up is hard to do

Fall had to leave itself behind for Winter to push its way forward though…just like I must continue to push my childhood back, continuously making room and striving for changes of adulthood.

~~~And I also feel like most of my blog posts are ALL-OVER-THE-PLACE…nothing really connects them~~~
So feel free to ignore my rantings


Excursion Surreality

Wowzah, do I have great friends, or what!?

Yesterday, Mi Amor & Rizo drove with me to be support for my interview {Which went FABULOUS} and to help move along the Grand Adventure. 

We got a car-load of my stuff into Rizo & my new house, then throughout the day we were able to hang out with friends, visit yummy, unique places, and enjoy the excursions of the day. 

My other roomie is ADORABLE. I cannot wait to be living in this house and get to know her better. It will be so fabulous to be able to style up the place in our way, but also see how she likes our style. Rizo & I already have perfectly blended styles. 

I arrived home, late last night and told my mom, “Its so weird being in the state. With this job opportunity with benefits and how great it’ll be, I feel old, but stuck in this little girl’s body who’s so nervous about ‘entering the real world’. Even though I’ve already had a job for nine months, it just feels like I’m starting with a clean slate…”

I’m really gonna have to work on my math skills–here come the flash cards!!! 
Compounding pharmacies are going to be a WHOLE different ball game, but I’m up for the challenge & learning experience. 
He wants me long term,
which is what I’m looking for too, 
not something I can just ‘fill in’ the cracks. 
I want to have a solid team.

Yesterday just went so well with everything, that its so surreal. 

I don’t think I’m really ever gonna catch up with myself…
Time is just flying by, 
but I’m TOTALLY in for the excursions of the Grand Adventure. 

50 days later

Fifty days from now I will have my last day of work.

Excitement, yes.
Sadness, as well.
Freedom, returns.

In the immersion of my ‘growing up’ process, I have realized how much I truly respect, admire, and love my parents. They do so much for me.

Appreciation overcomes my soul as I realize how much I love to be taken care of.

After riding 3/4 of a mile on two flat bike tires, then walking another 3/4 on foot, my bike handles were loose and sliding because of a bolt. I finally reached my destination and told my parents why I was late.
[[without telling anybody, my intention was to throw my bike in the back of my mom’s car and drive home with her…locking my bike in the shed until I felt the energy to fix it]]
My dad…ahhh my dad!
He aired up both my tires, tightened my handlebars and received a bigggg hug from me afterwards.
My mom, re-fluffed my laundry that I forgot about, and then folded it.

My dad added oil to my car, even though I told him I would that night…but of course I forgot..and he somehow knew I did!
Mom and Dad are always serving serving giving giving
completely aware of what others’ needs are.

Rizo and I got to make Crepes today before she left for her help-exchange France escape.
We got to talking about how we both have sets of parents who are, beyond a shadow of a doubt, amazing.  

Moving out will be unforgettable and will really give me some of the ‘college’ experience that I missed out on, having completed a concentrated course over a 5 month period.
Rizo and I talked about what I’m excited about and what I’m possibly going to miss/get scared about, moving out to the west side.
One of the cons is that my parents won’t be ‘taking care’ of me anymore. Even though they will be there at my every call, it won’t be the same.
Rizo said that after living off campus since last August, she comes back home and says, “It feels like a vacation, you treasure your time of being taken care of.”

I totally love my parents.
And in August, I am sure my love for them will only grow more, as well as my overwhelming appreciation for all they will and have already done for me. 

I’m Moving Away

Some of you may know my pursuit of Grand Rapids,
and now, it’s finally worked out.
{{Well, this part at least}}

I am officially going to the west side of the state the first of August!!!

A wonderful living situation was established and pursued by my lovely childhood bestie–whom I will from now on call Rizo.
God truly set up a beautiful preface to this Grand Story.

I’m as overwhelmed as a new pup when it discovers the fun of dry food. Ya know when they just lay on the floor, paws sprawled out, tongue lapping up in an A.D.D. fashion…yup, that’s me…figuratively nonetheless.

I’m like flipping out in the realization that I’m gonna be seriously leaving. Of course visiting is important and I will miss many things of home, but the adventure and experience of it all is what I’m looking forward to most.

My dad has taught me so many wonderful traits from character and cars to finances and theology.
My mom has been faithful in raising me to enjoy the kitchen duties and sewing as well as basics such as laundry and gift creativity.
I know how to can jellies and applesauce as well as grape juice.
I continually seek wisdom as I know my luxury days of having their examples everyday of my life is slowly fading away.

Observance is key.

OH! And I got a summer hair cut; nice and short.
Hopefully Mi Amor will love it.

Well, I believe I’ve ranted enough for the night…excuse me for I need to go on Pinterest now and religiously look over the home decor pages.

Deeper Seas

  • First day of work—check
  • Re-learned how to knit—check
  • Bought new chapstick (cause my insane collection is running out)—check
  • Get my brain running to make a leather-cord watch—check
  • Learned how to change the oil in my car—check
  • Make my car smell good—check 

Yeah, I feel accomplished !
I have done a lot in the last few days.
Today, especially, was a good day; I learned a lot of new stuff:

  • It’s incredible how much brain power it takes to be a cashier//bagger
  • Never underestimate the power of coupons
  • It’s always a humbling experience being a newbie
  • All the jazzical things that come with learning a new job 
  • I forgot how amazing paper bags are–almost vintage 🙂


It’s all pretty much a learning process for the next five days of work.
I’m glad that I’ll get tomorrow off, so that I can go to Encounter to worship my Lord with college-kids though.

I was hit with the realization of how different this job will be from H&R Block because…

1. I have many more co-workers
2. I have  more scheduled and punctual need
3. I may be more of a light for Christ at this job…

and to tell you the truth, I’m sorta nervous about that point…
I know that I naturally am proud of my Saviour, but I don’t want to proclaim it so that people are turned off and ignore me.
I think that if I just keep living with an attitude of love, then I’ll be a light in my own way–but when it comes down to it, when people find out that I am a disciple of Christ, I pray that they won’t shut down.

My trainer is a wonderful young woman, whom I will fully enjoy getting to know.
She might be one of the first people to know that I’m a disciple, but then again, maybe people will only see the difference and ask me, and not just ‘hear the gossip’.

Well, either/or, I’m going to be under a lot of mind escapes these next few months, with being trained as a cashier and pharmacy technician.
I think I did great today, but my trainer is so great at being constructive in her advice. It’s really a great opportunity that I have, to learn another skill and be in even more of a spot to be a witness for Christ.  

I’m being swallowed even more into the sea of life…growing up has its pros and cons…