Can I Eat Yet?

Our cute leopard wine cork (thanks Lauren!)

Our cute leopard wine cork (thanks Lauren!)

his and mine--pizza night

his and mine–pizza night


2 Tablespoons ground flax and 6 Tablespoons water, let it sit for 15 minutes and VIOLA! egg substitute.
I also made crab cakes with that idea, but didn’t snap a photo of those before they were devoured.

Recipe for crab/tuna cakes that your man will eat:

Egg Substitute: 2 Tablespoons ground flax and 6 Tablespoons water, let it sit for 15 minutes

Meanwhile put 4 mini sweet peppers and onion (1/4-1/2 cup) in Nutribullet, food processor, or whatever.

Add spices to egg mixture such as cracked pepper, pinch o’ salt, ground mustard, rosemary, and a bit of buffalo sauce for a kick.
Take either 2 8 oz. packages of crab, or one package and tuna, or two tuna cans, etc.. mix those in the bowl with the egg mixture and spices, add the pulsed onion and sweet pepper as well.
Pulse almonds and hemp seeds to a powder and put those in the mixture as well. Form into little cakes and refrigerate for at least 30 minutes. Use coconut oil in a pan and cook to brown on both sides.



Kefir Day 2

Day two of drinking Nurten! What a change of life I’m expecting… I can only pray God uses this tangy drink to heal me in His time. 

I know I’ve improved internally and on my hands because of the anti-candida diet. I can tell you that my legs have seen NO improvement whatsoever, but in all reality, my hands are a much bigger factor in my life. I thank God that I can still walk to work, although its getting tougher as my legs deal with cold temperatures and socks and rubbing of shoes.
Here are pictures so that I can go back and thank God for the healing He will do one day. I want visual proof of this journey.

itchy every night, burning and stinging throughout the day, and irritated by anything rubbed on it.

itchy every night, burning and stinging throughout the day, and irritated by anything rubbed on it.

left hand has redness, cuts and inflammation.

left hand has redness, cuts and inflammation.

right hand has no cuts only inflammation and redness

right hand has no cuts only inflammation and redness


I’m currently soaking my feet in lemongrass and cypress oils in hot water. After my walk home today, my legs were burning and annoyed.
I was less fatigued today, which is GREAT since for the last, hmmm, two weeks? I’ve been incredibly tired at work and not even wanting to stand on certain days. I am not sure if this surge of energy was thanks to Nurten or not, but some people say that one day is all it takes to see a difference.
Well, day 2, here we are, I drank it straight today and it was great. I decided that since yesterday I put in 2/3 of a cup of milk, that it poured a lot slower today. SO, I tried 1 cup of milk for tomorrow. We shall see what the consistency does for me then.

Once again I make my self vulnerable and translucent for all of you readers, hoping that through my most personal and embarrassing time you may see God’s hand through Jesus and how the Holy Spirit is leading and healing me.

Oh, Nurten, You’ll Help Somehow


This is kefir {keh-feer}
this is MY kefir
Thanks to a talk with another hospital worker, she gave me some of her kefir on Sunday. This is the picture of when I poured the milk into a glass and added more milk to the kefir jar.
Let me tell you what I know about kefir so you know what this crazy thing is I’m doing.

Just as each of our fingerprints is different, the bacterial content of the colon in each person is likewise different.—Kefir Blog


This is kefir uncovered; cauliflower is what it really reminds me of.

Kefir means “feels good” in Turkish

Unlike yogurt, kefir contains around thirty strains of bacteria and yeast, mostly including lactobacillus bacteria.–Grow Youthful

Do not keep your kefir in a metal container like copper, iron or aluminium. Preferably store it in a glass or ceramic container.
You can make kefir with nut milks, and nut kefir is apparently delicious. However the nut milk destroys the kefir grains, so you can only make it when you have got some spare grains.
{you get spare grains because it will continue to grow and grow in your jar. This allows you to give them away to friends who have health issues or who want to remain healthy. If you don’t have friends who can do this, then you have extra kefir grains}

Bacteria and yeasts typically found in milk kefir


l. brevis has been identified as the species responsible for the production of the polysaccharide (dextran) that forms the grains.
l. casei. Produces lots of lactic acid; colonises well in the gastric tract; creates a favourable medium in which other beneficial bacteria can grow; inhibits putrefaction and harmful bacteria; increases immune function; helps protect against bacterial infections.
l. hilgardii
l. plantarum. Produces lactic acid; fights listeria monocytogenes; makes plantaricin; inhibits a large number of Gram-positive bacteria – the type of bacteria that cause spoilage.
s. cremoris. Has similar properties to s. lactis.
s. diacetylactis. Produces carbon dioxide in the kefir; makes diacetyl, which gives kefir its characteristic odour; other properties similar to s. lactis.
s. lactis. Produces lactic acid, aids digestion, inhibits harmful microorganisms, produces bacteriolysins.


Kloeckera and possibly others.

Anyways, so this great probiotic is a alive and I’m calling mine Nurten. In Turkish it means “radiant skin”.

Day 1: the taste was a little tart and tangy–it reminded me of the ‘original’ flavor of frozen yogurt you can get at: TuttiFrutti, Sweetyos, Pink Berry, Pump House, or whatever other crazy name you have near you.
I blending mine into a shake though–since I can’t eat much on the anti-candida diet, I used this opportunity of tangy flavor to be a base for my “go-green” powder, carob powder, and ice. NutriBullet blended it wonderfully and it tasted pretty good. I’m willing to perfect the flavor. Maybe tomorrow I’ll do lemon and ginger? Worth a try at least.
The lovely lady who gifted Nurten to me told me that I should take the next few days to decide how much milk I should put in it to determine the consistency I like the best. Today I put in 2/3 of a cup. Tomorrow we shall see how different it was from today.

On to new adventures, new trials, new testings, and new beginnings.

You Are The God Who Sees

Now I have had a perfect winter morning walk
{Thanksgiving day to work}
and a perfect winter evening walk
{tonight at 7p.m. with Mi Amor}

The snow was abundant and daintily floating down from the heavens as we walked on the white fluff beneath our feet.
God truly is amazing–He is reflected in the beauty He creates.

Our pastor spoke on God’s Sovereignty tonight.
Sovereign meaning: One who is in control or exercises authority
.Read Genesis 16.

Well, our pastor asked us,
“When God promises us something, why do we get hasty and give ourselves an ‘Ishmael’ instead of waiting for God’s ‘Isaac’?”

In my mind, this is what I thought:

I will lead the blind by ways they have not known, along unfamiliar paths I will guide them; I will turn the darkness into light before them and make the rough places smooth. These are the things I will do; I will not forsake them.-Isaiah 42:16

God will not forsake me. I have known this throughout my entire path of healing, but sometimes, its hard to stay true to those promises; that He will not forsake us. He’s carrying us through. Those hard times are showing you what it means to be held.
I can’t imagine going through the crap that I have gone through without my Jesus.

I don’t want to be hasty and settle for a lifeboat when God’s got an island for me.
I want to heal more than anything in this world right now…its hard to focus on being God’s servant when there’s so much pain and hurt in my life. But, God is working on giving me a shield…

God teach me to fight
let me walk on hot coals
give me strength to make it through this

Heal me in Your time, with Your purpose set.
Give me the resources to change not only my life,
but those struggling in the dark pit that I am.

Up, Daddy, Up
Lift Me Up

Worth THAT Again…?

My stomach has been upset for the last few days…I don’t know what it is, but yesterday morning before work I did the spit test again to see what was going on and ya know what? My spit had tunnels again, not just clouding the glass…so somehow the candida is growing again—I don’t understand this…am I THAT sensitive?! When is this going to end??

This morning, after sleeping in till 8, I did a saline flush.
32 ounces of water with 2 teaspoons of pink earth salt.
Warm the water if its been through a filter in your fridge, swish it around till the salt is dissolved.
Get that whole thing down—it took me two minutes and I pretty much wanted to throw the whole thing up when I was done.
Colon cleanse here I come…
Try not to go to the bathroom for thirty minutes.
{If you attempt to do this, make sure you’re gonna be home for three hours…the bathroom is closely needed}

I’m taking yeast-away pills to help boost this out of my life.
I’m done, so done.
I had GOALS in a past post and I went back to look to see how far I’ve come…
In six weeks I’ve knocked out four and a half goals.

    • To be able to use my hands without worry of if my task will cause the pain in my hands to be worse.
    • To be able to flaunt myself to my husband without shame of my appearance.
    • To not be scared of taking showers. {cause of becoming too dry}
    • To be okay with people wanting to see my wedding ring.
    • No more consecutive restless nights of itching and pain.
    • To be able to give my husband a shoulder rub.
    • To not be afraid of what I eat and if I’ll have a reaction to it.
    • To help heal others because I am a testimony of healing.<————This one is in the works
    • To work out again; running and strength exercises

Okay, so I’m making progress through this long haul…its good to know that

  • starving all day——Is worth it
  • craving things that will harm me, but staying away from them——Is worth it
  • not smelling wonderful, but like a wanna-be-hippie——Is worth it
  • being tired and worn out——Is worth it
  • losing ten pounds and trying to gain it back——Is worth it
  • looking deeper into God’s will for my life——Is worth the whole thing again….

Yeah, honestly, I would probably throw things if I had to go through all of last year’s pain again, but if that side bar under my picture at the top of this page is true:

Come away with me as you enter the world of an adventurous soul whose purpose is to worship her Creator despite the hardships that invade.
This is a suitcase for my thoughts and plans and dreams.

Then my purpose is all I have to pursue—God is all I have to work towards, loving Him with all my heart and giving Him my thoughts and plans and dreams.

God, show me…show me where you want me…prepare me, continue preparing me.

Hard Ways to Learn Your Purpose

The resources are here. One year ago I began suffering from candida-induced eczema. Why is it that our bodies can scream “something is wrong!! Stop doing this!!’ but our brains don’t understand what ”this” is. Finding the root of any problem takes a lot of time..which requires patience…something I’ve tattooed my body with in order to remind me that God needs to be the leader and director-situations aren’t for me to control, but are an opportunity for His strength and power.

You can go back through my archives and see only a few posts in early 2013 that showcased my eczema. It is a hard topic to talk about, but as it has covered my body, it is getting easier to be translucent about it and use this vulnerability for good.

I question what my purpose is, aside from my ultimate purpose to worship my Creator, despite the hardships that invade. How does He want me to use my story and my passions…what are my passions anyways? And ya know what my husband said, “you should pray and ask God to show you what your passions are.”
I love being married.

So, I have been praying about it. The more I ponder it in my head, the more it makes sense that eventually I’ll be helping heal people in a different way than I am now. I can see how this spot that I’m in now, being in pharmacy, has helped me understand the side of medicine that is so bittersweet. But, I definitely don’t know enough.
Modern medicine has its pros and cons, just like herbals do.
I believe, from my pharmaceutical side, that too many people use herbs without knowing their toxicity and herb-to-herb interactions. Ignorant use of even herbs can be dangerous.
But, I also believe, from my earthy side, that too many people use drugs as their ‘answer’ when all they really are doing is treating the symptoms and not asking “WHY is my body reacting this way, WHY are these two things happening at the same time, WHY did this happen so soon?”…etc…

Maybe God is using my eczema to say, “Sarah, this is where I want you, and now that you’ve been through this horribly hard journey, you’re prepared even more…that’s right, I’m preparing you, preparing you for My glory.”

Still Sweet

Okay, so if you’ve followed my blog at all, you know that I LOVE cooking and baking and trying to find healthy alternatives to those overwhelming amounts of sugar and fats that make our delicious dishes..well, delicious! 

Since my detox diet (anti-candida) I’ve found that food isn’t involved as much anymore. Its harder to find an art in the few foods that I can eat, so when I make stuff for Mi Amor, I’m disconnected. I can’t taste it to see if there is enough flavor or the texture is proper… I have learned to say, “I’m not going to be offended if you put sauce or more herbs on this.”

I don’t want him eating terribly because I don’t have a good digestive system..or whatever is wrong with me…

So, today, after dropping Mi Amor off at work, I headed to Gram and Gramp’s house to bake up a storm and visit!

Listening to music…
…enjoying the smells of cinnamon…
…the sight of fluffy snow and squirrels dancing across it…
…and resisting all the things I’m making and HOPING that they taste good… if you can’t tell—that’s the lame part.

I’m staying strong and while I was baking I made myself a yummy little dish:

Melt coconut oil and add carob powder, cinnamon, and ground flaxseed. Place in sprayed baking dish. For the filling I melted peanut butter only made from peanuts (nothing added) and plain, all natural yogurt (no sugar or additives) almonds, and walnuts. Tablespoon of pure vanilla (or from the bean).
Bake for 10 minutes at 350 degrees.

Eat from the dish and enjoy a few spoonfuls before you start eating all those wonderful cookies and scones and bars that you just made…

I love Grandma and Grandpa. Its such a joy to be here…
She mentioned that this is the first time I’ve been here baking as a married woman. I adore our talks and time together… It was just her and I this morning, since Grandpa was at work.
Well, we are leaving shortly for lunch with friends after a seminar on “Renting Lacy” a anti-trafficking story of a woman who was prostituted.