If passion drives you, let reason hold the reins.
Ever since I was little, I always felt like I was a warrior, just like my big brother. I would grow up strong and unmovable; I would be ahead of the game.
I found out that I am weak and brittle; I am human.
I think that everybody has this desire to be able to fix their own problems yet wants somebody there to comfort them through it. It’s just really hard when the one who is part of the problem is the one you want comfort from.
I think I’m doing 50% better on the trust issue with God, now I have problems with holding myself back.
Isn’t that how it goes though?
…be gentle with me Jesus, as you tear me apart…
(JJ Heller-Until Only Love Remains)
This is a great song to listen to, so please do so at this moment. And think about the words.
When we give our lives to God, and attempt to give Him all areas of our life, He slowly breaks us down, we let go of this area and that one. He begins to mold us into a beautiful work of art-one of original intention.
So, I have given this area and that area, trying to give my entire life, since I became a God-lover. We broke through the trust issue, and now I’ve improved. So, God is beginning to change my focus DEEPLY to self-control.
If I want to become a person where ‘only love remains’, I have to reach the point of taking the plank out of my eye.
When I was that little warrior, I thought I had it all figured out-that became my foundation and when I reached my breaking point I realized how blind I became because my foundation was sand.
All men are tempted. There is no man who lives that can’t be broken down, provided it is the right temptation, put in the right spot.
I am imperfect, helpless, weak, vulnerable, wavered, and-lets face it-an idiot.
Thanks to mi dulce Salvador, I know this and can ask Him to change these.
It’s just getting to the point where I REALLY want to change it…this is such a hard subject to talk about…let me express more with quotes:
There is a charm about the forbidden that makes it unspeakably desirable.
What makes resisting temptation difficult for many people is they don’t want to discourage it completely.
I suppose coming down to point-blank is step one. Understanding what needs to be changed, controlling yourself, and holding to the Rock-Solid Foundation become the next.
THAT one, “holding to the Rock-Solid Foundation”…that’s where I fall on my face.
I go through all these spirals…I can’t stick to Him…I can’t keep in step and stick to these yet; I can’t control myself to stay in line.
I read my Bible (with my mindset being to learn and grow) I always need to pray more, but I do, and I fellowship with other believers all the time as well.
…am I a hypocrite?
…what am I missing?
…what is the glue for God, me and control?